Turning 30

So, I’m 30 now.  Some people might dread the number or start feeling like their youth is over, but really, I don’t have a problem with it.  I feel like I’ve been getting better with age, so 30 is a welcome landmark. And after proving to myself and others that I’m still young at heart by celebrating with a game of Ultimate Frisbee, I can tell that this is going to be a great decade.

To make sure I start off my 30’s right, I’m doing a Crush 2012 goal-setting seminar with my friend Deacon Bradley.  I’ve never been much of a goal setter, and it’s not a skill that comes naturally to me.  Deacon, on the other hand, is a goal-setting machine, and over the past year, he’s built a business around helping others meet their potential.  I’ve read books and articles in the same vein before, and they’ve never had a big impact on my life, but this time I can already tell there’s a big difference.

I've always been bad at homework.  I am a black belt level procrastinator, and the TV has always been my go-to distraction.  But this week, when Deacon gave me a list of self-reflective questions to answer, I was excited about it.  In fact, I finished all my work that same night, with a full week to spare. Why? Is it because I removed the greatest momentum killer in my life?

In years B.U.P. (before unplugging), I would be at church or work, and I would get inspired to change, or read, or create something.  But as I approached home, I could already feel my resolve waning.  The ONLY thing I wanted to do was lie on the couch and watch TV – after all, I deserved some time to relax, right?   After slumping on the sofa, the unfortunate side effect was that any productive impulse drained out of my body.

Now, when I have an incomplete thought in my head, I want to keep pursuing it. It's like a loose string that I have to tie off before moving on.  So when Deacon gave me an exercise to help me pinpoint my values and create a vision for my life, I felt driven to finish it.  And it was a very rewarding experience.

It may not be a surprise that “Family” is one of my top 3 core values, which seems obvious, and something I would have told you even before this exercise.  But to see how deeply ingrained it is to my identity was a wonderful revelation.  I now understand why it has been so easy and gratifying to give up something that was firmly integrated into my life.  My TV habit violated my core value of the importance of family.

When you give up something that is ultimately at odds with your core values, it doesn't feel like much of a sacrifice.  It feels like a blessing.

Chêz felt the same way when she decided to eat vegan. She’s a very compassionate person towards people and animals alike, so when she could no longer reconcile her diet with her heart, she followed her values.  It wasn't a struggle for her to avoid hamburgers. It was like freeing her conscience.

Even though I’m not a vegan, I am so glad she made that decision.  Earlier this week, after we had eaten together and put Eliza to bed, I told her that her decision to be vegan was one of the best things that has ever happened to our family.  Because she followed her convictions, we have a wife/mother who is passionate about food and nutrition and who has become an amazing chef. 

Good things happen when you follow your values.  I’m already blessed to be feeling the effects of this truth in my life, and I’m excited to see what’s to come in my next 30 years.